I haven't updated this in a long time. It is not for a lack of want, or even time for that matter. More that I have been lazy and forgot.
I'm currently cruising at 37k feet while I'm writing this, tho it will be posted when I reach my hotel in the midwest. What a year 2012 was. It was not a good year to be sure. I lost my dog, my grandmother, failed to match on my initial residency and suffered at times crippling anxiety that hurt me to my core. But 2012, for all of it's negatives, also offered some positive experiences.
I was able to go to my grandmothers funeral and obtain some closure over the abuse I suffered at her hands. I was able to be there for Sir's 40th birthday and present him with a beautiful cake that I worked really hard to pay for and a party that I mostly planned. I also engaged in therapy in 2012 for assistance with dealing with some past traumas, an experience which while not complete by any means, was fruitful. I am looking to continue that into 2013.
I also hope to match this year, something that would propel me one step closer to being a doctor and would place me in a new city, living on my own. This is an exciting premise, as I have not ever truly lived on my own. I've always had roommates or partners to answer to, and this will afford me the ability to truly set up a space that is mine and allows me to explore myself, my sexuality, and my nature to a degree I have never known. I look forward to the experience, as well as the possibility of being more free to do assignments and be available for Sir whenever he wishes.
Growth is hard. Trauma is painful. But both create new buds and flowers that shape who we are. I hope 2013 is a fruitful year.
(Also, I can say that so far in 2013 I have clocked over 5k miles, and will have clocked almost 20k air miles when I'm finished before the end of this mouth. Not bad for a guy who used to be so terrified of flying he had to be unconscious for most of it.
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