I try to live my life without a large deal of regret. I really do. It's hard though, because there are a lot of events from my past that I know if I did them differently, I might know myself better or be in a better place because of them. I'm sure most people can say this. How many of us act and then realize had we walked down a different path, our outcomes would have been better?
Regardless of what I could have done, a conversation with a friend the other day really made me think. He said from the standpoint of self-esteem, wanting to be a submissive in ALL aspects of a relationship is what gets me into the unfortunate relationships I often see myself in. The relationships are loving to be sure, but the problem is that the M/s D/s aspect of it fades away so quickly, and then there is a relationship where my needs arn't getting met yet I'm expected to do what I'm told. That wouldn't be so bad if the double standard wasn't there. I don't know...it got me thinking to be sure. I haven't figured it out yet.
All of us have regret. Most of the time it comes at us years and years later.
ReplyDeleteThere are infinite regrets, yet only one life we lead. Thus, make your choices still, but be confident... and realize that we all regret. It is our nature as humans to wonder and imagine.
As for deteriorating relationships. I think, in a sense, all relationships deteriorate. The issue is, is it declining in the same way for both parties so that reality meets expectation?
If one party after 10 years still has the same interests as day 1 while the other doesn't. There will be problems. And heaven forbid the interests didn't line up to start, as one person gave up their choices in the pursuit of the other... they would never line up.
Being submissive 24/7 is possible, but it isn't feasible. The fantasy of being "puppified" every waking (and non-waking) moment sounds fun, but unless you don't have to interact outside the home, it isn't realistic. Imagine being locked in a puppy hood and having to get the mail. Odds are either there'd be a new mailman on the route or a cop or two investigating what's going on shortly thereafter.
There's no easy answer to what works. Each person can handle dreams and desires differently so you'll need to find what works for you.